i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
