I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize