i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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