A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Randomize
