The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Randomize
