my mouth tastes like poor choices
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
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