I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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