Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
