i don't plan on having that self control this summer
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize