we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize
