I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
