What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
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