In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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