There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Randomize
