i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize