someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize