I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
