I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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