i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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