It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
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