I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
