alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
