That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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