I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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