Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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