I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I would ride that face into the sunset
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
