i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize