The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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