i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
