I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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