Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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