She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
