with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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