Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
