i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
she pinky promised me she was 18
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize