Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize