My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
