I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Randomize
