what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
