His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Randomize
