I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
