dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
i now understand why vodka
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize
