Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
