We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
