AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
So many bounce houses so little time
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
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