Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
