I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Randomize
