I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I cockslap morals
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
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