She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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