its not stalking. its research.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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