I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize
